Q: Can you sue the state of MD for a false accusation?

A: The state of Maryland did not accuse you of stealing that purse, it was a dude in a Maryland sweatshirt.

So, no, you can't sue the state of Maryland for false accusation.

You can't sue the guy either, since you're still holding the purse, and rifling through it as we speak.

Q: What are the drug categories?

A: Drugs fall into three categories:

Drugs That Are Perfectly Okay: Caffeine, Pain Killers (in proper doses), Decongestants, Appetite Suppressants, Sleep Aids, Drugs that Cure AIDs or Cancer.

Drugs that Are Okay Provided You Are Charismatic Or Talented: Marijuana, Pain Killers (in excessive amounts), Amphetamines, A Little Bit of Cocaine

Drugs that Are Bad: Heroin, Crack, Methaphetamines, Drugs that Make You Good at Sports,

I hope that clears up any confusion.

Please note: this list is not acceptable in a court of law.

Q: Could you shoot a gun from a jet ski?

A:  I have shot a gun in the following situations:

 - While on a jet ski.
 - While making love to a beautiful woman in a hammock suspended between two Black Hawk helicopters
 - While falling backward down a mine shaft.
 - While running down the stairs of the Statue of Liberty, a rare bird in a rare cage in one hand, an antique musket in the other.
 - While ski-diving. From a Space Shuttle.
 - While leaping out of the way of an exploding limousine of the international criminal mastermind who ordered the execution of my wife and family.
 - While soaring across the Snake River Canyon in a homemade rocket.
 - While crawling out of the fiery pits of hell.

As you can see, in my career as an international super cop, I have fired a gun in every conceivable scenario, which more than qualifies for a role in your Burn Notice fan film.

I look forward to your reply, and I thank you in advance for your consideration.