Q: Why has one eye gotten smaller than the other?

A: Your eye isn't getting smaller. It's swelling shut. Because you keep getting hit in the face.

That's also why you keep spitting out teeth.

And why you can't breath out of your nose anymore.

There's a reason amateurs are forbidden from competing in the Kumite. 

I guess your brother's death will go unavenged. 

No, don't try that. 

That's not the Dim Mak. 

That's the Shocker. 

That won't help you at all. 

Q: How do you think your friends see you as a person?

A: I think they see me as wise, brave, responsible, disciplined, and most of all, trust worthy.

My friends are a slow witted bunch, and easily manipulated.

That's why I associate with them.

Q: Why does Lennie blame animals for their own death?

A: There are two theories.

The first theory is that he is projecting his guilt onto the deceased animals. He blames them for coming into contact with a being as harmful as himself and thinks they must accept culpability in their own demise.

The second theory is that he is really stupid.

Q: Why is follow through used with rackets?

A: That's how we make money.

Look, I'll explain it once more time, for the last time.

We offer protection to local businessmen and merchants and shop owners and landlords. They pay us a tidy sum every week to keep their businesses safe. To stop them from being robbed, or shot up, or burned to the ground. If they don't pay us the protection, we rob them, or shoot them up or burn their places to the the ground. You see how this works? Do you understand?

You're shaking your head. Okay. I'll make this real simple. We are the criminals. We will rob these people and steal from them and hurt them unless they pay us not to do so. They give us money, cash money. I'd say that's a pretty good racket.

But for it to work, we have to follow through. We have to visit these merchants every week and collect the protection money. We can't just threaten them once and then sit at home and expect the money to pour in. We can't just set up a Paypal account and hand out our email and expect people to send us money. We have to go out there, every week, every day, and remind these people what will happen if they don't pay us.

Yes, that involves leaving the house. Today. Right now.

I don't think agoraphobia is a real thing. I think you are just lazy.

Q: Is it safe to sleep with a computer?

A: As long as you don't confuse sex with love.

Computers can not love.

That's why, no matter how many times I write it in notebooks, I will never be Mr. Ryan Braniac.