Q: Should animals have the same rights as humans?

A: I don't think so. If they did, what would we eat?

Or ride?

Or hunt?

Or lock in a cage and force to fight?

That reminds me, you still owe me $20. I can't believe you thought your cat had a chance in there.

Q: Do robots have souls?

A: I understand that you are sad. I understand that this is a confusing time for you. I will make this very clear.

Robots do not have souls. They are just a pile of plastic and metal and wires and computer chips.

No matter how lifelike they appear, they are just machines. Machines don't have souls

I know I may have said things in the past that slightly contradicted that statement. I may have said things like, "Robots have souls." Things like, "Nothing beats a beautiful, robot wife." Things like, "You should marry this beautiful robot I made for you. It, she, totally has a soul and will love you forever."

So I see why you are confused. When I told you that robots had souls, and you should marry one, I had the best intentions. Everyone in town had married a robot. We were happy and content. We thought a real woman would never love us like a robot wife could.

That's before they opened that new girl's college. Those girls know how to party. They can love us in ways our robot wives never could. And they can do it again and  again, all night long. And we never have to clean them or worry about a short circuit. There's no threat of electrocution.

These real girls are better than our robot wives. That's why destroyed them. Now, it's your turn.

Your wife is a robot. She is a machine. She doesn't have a soul.

It's time to say goodbye.

Besides, you haven't cleaned her in months and she's really freaking out the girls. Some of them are starting to leave.

Please, do me a favor and destroy your soulless, robot wife and I promise I will totally make sure we bring a girl for you next time.

Q: What was the role of the president as established by the founding fathers?

A: The President was intended to be very handsome, speak well, and have a face suitable for money.

He would primarily serve as a figure head and a target for assassins.

As the position evolved, The President was also expected to solve crimes in his spare time.

Q: What tools do Inuits hunt with?

A: Obviously, they used their Intuition.

They're called what?

Really?

It's In-u-its? I always thought they were called the In-tu-its.

Seriously, I've been making that joke for years.

That does explain why no one ever laughed.

Except that one guy. But I think he was on something.

Q: Why is your heater blowing cold air when you slow down?

A: You are just full of questions today, aren't you?

Who are you? Where are you taking me? Why do I have to drink this? Why does it smell funny?

If you must know, I've had this car for a while and the heat doesn't always work too well. That's why I where this overcoat.  Because my car gets cold. Not for any other reason.

I did tell you to wear something warm. But you insisted on trying to run away and trying to fight and kicking and biting, instead of finding a warm coat. So, who's to blame there?

You'll be warm soon. We're almost at the cabin.

No, I can't tell you where it is. And I'm not going to tell you my name. Please, stop asking.

You can sit by the fire and warm up once we get inside. I'm going to need some quiet time.

I still need to cut out all the letters from different magazines. It takes a lot of time. In the end, it's worth it.

I mean, I hope it's worth it, for your sake.