Monday, November 14, 2011

Q: What is wattage of ATM Bank Machine?

A: Whatever wattage it needs to run the machine and make the screen glow and light up that little light next to the slot where you put your card. I don't know, 11. 11 watts. Does that sound right?

I'm not a scientist, okay. If I were a scientist, I wouldn't need you to build me a magical ATM card that would let me withdraw all the money in any ATM with a single swipe, I would build it myself. But I'm not a scientist, I'm merely a genius. The genius who not only came up with the idea of a magical ATM card, but who also drew a detailed schematic.

All I need you to do is build it. If I had known I was going to be subjected to a series of stupid questions, I would have just asked my father for money and not gone to the trouble of designing the greatest invention in the history of man.

Now, are you going to build it? Or are you going to let them shut off my cable?

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Ryan Callahan has written, produced, or directed shows for ABC, A&E, SHowtime, The CW, TVLand, Animal Planet and other networks even lower on your dial. When not making TV, or writing fake answers, he reads books, buys books, or buys books to read later. Follow WikiFakeAnswers on Twitter and Facebook