Q: Why do wood floors feel warmer than ceramic tiles to bare feet?

A: Ceramic draws the heat away from your feet faster than wood.

Also, the house is on fire.

I told you you should have hired the A-Team to take care of that gang of arsonists holding us up for protection money.

But, no, they were too expensive. You had to find someone cheaper.

And who's cheaper than Encyclopedia Brown?

I hope the money you saved was worth it. Maybe our kids can buy us a nice casket.