Q: How do you set up the outside of a letter?

A: Typically, you put the receipt's address right in the center of the envelope, in nice, big, clear handwriting.

Now, that's the whole address, not just a first name and a town. And this spot here, after the state abbreviation? That's where you put the zip codes.

If you don't know the zip code, you can look it up. It's a five digit number. Every address has one.

I see what you did here, but 5 question marks really doesn't help.

Now, up here, in the top left corner, you put the return address. This would be the sender's address. This would be your address.

Your actual address.

I'm pretty sure your address is not The Bat-Cave, Outskirts of Gotham

You don't live in the Bat-Cave.

You are not Batman. That's just a Halloween costume.

Do you think you'll be taking that off anytime soon?

No? Maybe next week.

Anyway. that's how you address a letter. Up here, in the top right corner, you would put a stamp.

Yup, right there. Right where you put all those Garfield stickers.

Garfield stickers have no monetary value. They are not acceptable postage.

So, you didn't put any stamps on the letter, you used a fake return address, and you don't know the zip code.

I think I finally understand why you didn't get any presents this year.

Santa can't bring you presents if he never gets your letters.

Better luck next year, son.