Q: What happens to the fish when a river floods?

A: They come right to you, right up on the land, right up to your front door; sometimes, if you've planned well enough, and the flood severe enough, they come right into the frying pan. You won't have to spend another second wading into the water, the muck slipping into your boots, your hands filthy with worm guts, waiting, waiting for hours in the hopes of catching one fish, two if you're lucky, all to please that horrible wife of yours - the one who's sister you should have married when you had the chance - your wife with her "delicate system" who can only digest fish, fresh fish, fresh freshwater fish. Trout mostly. She loves trout.

Well, she's about to get all the trout she can handle. Trout for days. That river will be flooded in no time, the fish crawling into the streets, literally knocking at our door.

Now, handle me that other stick of dynamite. I hope we brought enough. From a distance, this dam seemed small and feeble. Up close, it's larger and sturdier than I imagined. No time for second guessing. We've come this far.

All right, let's move over by that car, some place a little safer. Charges are set, everything appears to be ready. Floaties inflated?

Good. It looks like we've thought of everything. On the count of three, blow the damn thing.

One ...
Two ...
You should hold your breath. Things are about to get mighty wet.
Three!