Q: How do you get an old bankruptcy removed from your credit report?

A: Either wait seven years or fake your own death. Since you are probably as bad as budgeting time as your are with budgeting money, you will probably choose faking your own death. Congratulations! And welcome to the fun and exciting world of faking your own death.

You will need the following supplies:

1. A previously dead body, similar to yours in height, weight and bone structure.
2. An abandoned building.
3. Matches.

Good luck!

P.S. Remember the first rule of faking your own death:

Do not really kill yourself.