This country has become so goddamn politically correct that we can't even use the homeless anymore. The homeless. Like they have anything better to do with their time.
These days, everyone has a lobbyist, or an activist, or a concerned celebrity.
Except bacteria. No one holds rallies for bacteria. No one donates to "Save the Bacteria" telethons. No one cares about bacteria.
It's a good thing that bacteria don't have feelings. At least as far as we know. We haven't studied whether or not they have feelings. We're going to get around to that, I promise. Right after we bioengineer a chicken that produces Cadbury Creme Eggs.
