Q: Is it absolutely mandatory for university students to find summer jobs during summer break?

A: Of course not, honey. But I'd hate to see you give up on your dream.

If you want to write that bestseller about being a college student by day and an escort by night, you're going to have to, you know, someday be an escort.

You can't sit around the house all summer, eating nachos and watching Sex and the City reruns and say you're turning tricks. That doesn't count.

I know it hurt when the big agencies turned you down, honey, but that doesn't mean you have to give up on yourself. I hear a lot of girls in your field start small, with an ad on Craigslist.

Make sure you don't use a recent picture. What do they feed you at that college? Gravy?